Between now and the next five minutes, you'll either hate me or stand with me!

Have you ever felt a pain so deep it changes who you are? A void so vast it swallows your future? That's grief! But what happens when that grief is not just for one person, but for your entire essence? Let me tell you a story of my grief!

In 2005 I nearly drowned in a small Nigerian river called Ukoghoro. There were more than fifty people around me, and none of them knew I was fighting for my life! This exact experience mirrors the daily struggles of countless individuals, drowning and dying silently, not in small Nigerian rivers like Ukoghoro, but in deep seas of societal expectations and fears.

From childhood, I had battled to accept myself in a world that refused to accept me. I was beaten by my colleagues, bullied relentlessly in school and universities, simply because I was different. I was suffocated, hiding my true self, and questioning my fate, is this me? I was a ghost! No, I am a ghost! Never truly belonging, I was hovering, and every step and breath met with fear, disgust, and rejection.

I wanted to be seen, heard, and accepted, but when I tried, public spaces became painful prisons built to erase me! I eventually grew to dread human interactions, especially from those who claim to uphold the values.

Let me ask: When you kneel to say that prayer to the one in whose image you were made, what about me? In whose image was I made? Who are you to decide who deserves love? Who gave you the power to make others invisible? What makes you think your version of normal is the only one that matters?

But my grief is not for myself, but all those countless individuals facing the battles you, your laws, and your societies set them up for. They are drowning in despair, grappling with suicide, and losing to drug abuse. They are showered with knives in your streets, paraded in glory in their nakedness, and left to the mercy of your corrupt judiciary system. Simply because they have no one to turn to. But who do they turn to when society turns its back? Who do they run to when their own families abandon them? Who do they call when you, yes, even you condemn them?

In just 15 months, I've known so many lives lost, each death, a story, a voice, a burden, I will bear! It gets heavy sometimes, even for me, it does! My permanent grief is for all of us hiding in plain sight, those facing imprisonment or death for simply being true to themselves, those stripping themselves of their identities to stay part of your communities!

Yes! You know these people! You know who they are! They are those you judge without knowing their stories! Those your laws and society persecute! The ones your silence hurts! 

But you don't have to be them to help them! You don't have to be me to help me! You don't need to share our experiences, feel our injuries, or touch our wounds to show compassion! But when you talk of human rights, do you mean all humans? When you speak of love, do you mean all love? When you talk about unity, do you mean everyone? When you champion youth participation, do you mean all youths? When you reach out, dearest leaders, how far do you reach?

I am just Kelsey, the storyteller from the Nigerian Eastern coast, and this is my permanent grief! But it doesn't have to be! With your help, we can mold this grief into hope, this unbearable pain, into progress!

Don't stay silent! Challenge your prejudice! Test your conscience! Be the leader you've grown to be! Speak for those without voices! Support those who can't stand! Be the change that transforms grief into lasting joy! Because, in the end, we are all human, and we deserve to live authentically, love openly, and dream freely! We can make this a reality for all!

Like Mandela said, to be free, is not merely to cast off one's chain, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others! 

Are you ready to stand for true freedom, with me?